20 THINGS I MISS

Inspired by his entry, here's my own list.

1. Studying in college libraries while still in high school
2. When Mariah used to have consistent #1 hits
3. My mother randomly bringing me bowls of something sweet but always nutritious
4. Seeing how fuckin cool I was in the eyes of my middle school students
5. My childlike faith in God
6. The dreaded wait for the 1-9 train at 3 am during New York’s winter.
7. My Nintendo with Zelda and Super Mario Bros 1, 2, & 3.
8. Getting a 98 on a Math test and figuring out why the hell I got 1 wrong !
9. When time took forever
10. Playing spades with Ann, Jin and Rob
11. Art projects
12. My almost washboard abs
13. My grandmother’s last hours awake
14. Invincibility
15. Falling in love
16. When having a bestest friend was all you needed
17. Long drives at night
18. Reuniting with your high school buds at Dennys during college breaks
19. When boredom was a part of life and not something to fear
20. My overactive imagination

THE SWEETEST THINGS

 
1. Yesterday I met the sweetest guy.  I just didnt realize he was there during the 6 months we dated.  Perhaps it's only in friendship can we begin to be there for each other. 

2. My entire family (aunts, uncles, & cousins) live in the Philly area. Well, almost everyone. My uncle died about 13 yrs ago in a car accident, leaving behind my aunt and two rambunctious boys, ages 3 and 2.  My aunt remarried soon after and moved away to another state.  Eventually we all lost touch and understandably so.  I guess she never figured out a way to tell her two boys about their bioligical father and us - the extended family on the father's side.
 
Last week I found out that she had recently moved to LA... and today, armed with an envelope of photographs and family stories, I am going to go have dinner with her in  about 3 hours.  Bittersweet?  Oh yeah.
 
3. The new Ipod - Having the soundtracks of my crazy existence stored, sorted, and playlisted into this beeeeautiful gadget is a sweet sweet thing. 
 
4. When Nate puts on his suit and quietly joins David downstairs at the funeral in last week's Six Feet Under episode.
 
5. The best and most beautiful things in the world cannot be seen or even touched. They must be felt with the heart.  - Helen Keller

   

PUBLIC SERVICE ANNOUNCEMENT

 
 
 
Someone needs to issue a statement that posing with your "T-shirt-over-n-behind-ur-head-but-keep-ur-arms-in-the-sleeves" is just NOT sexy. 

ISO A FAG HAG

My dear college friend Ann has been with me thru thick and thin (tho that don't mean she was always nice about it) but now she's married to a good guy, has got herself an adorable son, pregnant with her second, and lives somewhere past Pasadena. Can you imagine? People actaully living past Pasadena! Believe you and me, a place like that exists cause last week, her parents just moved from Virginia into her non 310 slash 323 area code.

So anyway, I've never really thought about it but these days as I'm spending Saturday afternoons alone, single and alone, I can't help but to think that I have been robbed of every gay man's right to have their very own FAG HAG.

I mean, who can I go to with all my insignificant problems? Who can I call everytime HE calls? Who can I be on the phone with whenever my boss needs me? Who can I watch tearjerkers with and sing Wilson Phillips with? Who can I share the latest "He's soo gay" rumor with? Who will I go buy an overpriced cup of coffee while shopping with? Who will I take to straight company functions and then hit the gay bars after with?

All my Willy friends have their own Graces and hanging out with all of them only begs the question,"Where's my replacement?"

Funny thing about Fag Hags tho. They are no fun, bitches from hell unless they are your very own.

I CAN BE STUBBORN TOO

True story from the radio this morning.

An elderly man slipped and fell on to his driveway. Unable to get up, his wife tried to help. "Get away from me woman," he shouted. She then tried to call for help but the husband, being stubborn and proud, forbid her to do so. During the next two days, the man remained on his driveway, day and night. As needed, his wife brought him water and food and when it rained, she brought out a tarp to cover him. The neighbors offered to help but the proud man refused, shouting "Get off my property! I don't need your help." On the third day, the wife herself slipped and fell. She too was now unable to get up. When the neighbors saw that both the elderly man and woman were down on the driveway, they insisted that they help. "Yes, please help me!" the woman plead. As for the husband, it was too late. He had died.

Sometimes I don't stop and ask for directions. I think now maybe I should.

GAYS OF OUR LIVES

Last night, I dreamt that I was performing Tina Turner's hit "A Fool in Love" with Bette Midler. She was impressed and the audience loved me.

It's Press Tour at work today so I dressed in my black Emporio Armani suit along with an striped, open collar, light blue dress shirt. Despite the fact that I couldnt button my top pant button (Mental note: Hit the gym !) I looked pretty damn sharp which nicely contrasted the soft golden tan I got this weekend from playing beach volleyball.

At work, as soon as I logged online, I looked up info re: the Moulin Rouge Sing-Along at the Ford Amphitheatre this Wednesday. I then emailed the usual suspects of my crew to see if anyone was interested. If you are in LA, I highly suggest this OUTFEST sponsered screening. Just imagine 200 lesbians singing Ewan McGregor and 1000 gay men singing in harmony as Nicole Kidman.

For more info, www.outfest.org/fest2004

Also, my stocks keep dropping, Fantasia has a #1 hit, I missed Six Feet Under last night and I think I'm bored.

Again.

UNSOLVED MYSTERY

I think I'm doomed to spend my life trying to figure out the difference between being lonely and being bored.

Anyone? Anyone?

SOMETIMES PEOPLE ARE JUST TOO FUNNY

ON A POSITIVE NOTE

I pulled out my guitar yesterday. Played an old song I wrote about old friendships. Since you weren't there, let me just tell you.. it's beautifully written and I sang it in perfect key. =) Seriously, I did!

WONDER FACTS

Last night, as a belated b-day present from Darren, I got the Wonder Woman DVD box set. Man, did that bring back memories ! I did not realize it then but this show was so heavy on the CAMP! We also sat mesmerized through the Wonder Retro Documentary and did you know that...

1. Wonder Woman creator, William Moulton Marston, also invented the Lie Detector! then imbued that science into his heroine's magic lasso.

2. Lynda Carter, having been a dancer, suggested that she twirl as she changed into Wonder Woman.

3. HOWEVER, in the first few episodes, the infamous twirl was only a stop-n-go motion camera trick which had Lynda Carter doing a slow-mo strip tease. Too expensive and timely to set up the shot each time, producers decided to come up with an alt. that was ultimately better and almost orgasmic! "I know, let's have her spin into a burst of light!"



4. Wonder Woman's bracelets actually had a sparking contraption built into them and Lynda Carter would set them off herself by squeezing a small pump held in her hand - hence her fists always being closed!

5. Wonder Woman's outfit got a sexy upgrade as she switched from ABC to CBS.

INTERESTING INTERESTING

Life is interesting for the lack of a better word.

I was commenting to my buddy Matt about how the memories of my childhood and adolescene are now so far removed from who and where I am now, they have become more than just an arm length away. You see, I can't reach back and hold on to them like I used to.

Thats what happens as you get older, I guess.

This whole breakup with Steve has sent me on a rollercoaster of thoughts and emotions.. tho don't worry bout me, I'm not sad and pathetic like I was when I moved away from NYC two years ago to be further away from my first love. Praise the Lord ! for those times are also long gone and removed as well.

This is different. Today is different. I can't explain why but it is.

In many ways, I feel like its a new start for me - which explains why I am looking back to remember the past. I guess its natural that we all just want to hold on to something. To steady ourselves, to regain balance... and now that the past seems too false to hold on to and the future, yet to materialize, Im having trouble finding something to hold. The present? yeah well, that's just too fickle to have faith in.

How anyone stays sane in this life is a big mystery to me.

This blog entry makes no sense and is probably of no interest to anyone.
Interesting Intersting? Ah well, sorry for the false advertising.

Anyone got a party to invite me to tonite?