1.14.2004

NEW KID ON THE BLOCK

Today I met an 18 year old Korean kid who just moved to LA a few months ago. Accepted to Harvard and Princeton, he courageously decided that his first priority in finding himself was to come out to his parents. As a result, he was forced out of his home and his comfort zone and is now, in LA, working a blue collar job in the morning and volunteering at a non profit gay organization in the afternoons.

My heart breaks thinking about his situation and altho he shys away from talkin about his painful family situation, he is refreshingly optomisitic and hopeful for his future.

18 years old ! A DECADE younger than I am.

A friend and I drove him home to his small rental apt. On the way, we passed several million dollar homes of people who no doubt had made it .. at least financially. The contrast was very humbling and I could not help but to think about my life and my home with my parents who I am so fuckin fortunate to have as my own.

I am neither here nor there, somewhere in between instead. I am ashamed that I do have answers for this kid but yet inspired by his energy. I want more than anything to give this kid some guarantees but I guess the only I can do so is to find myself, to find hope in my dreams, to be thankful for what I have, and to live day by day rejoicing in the fact that I am free to be me.

If I can do that now, then its possible for me to see a bright future for this kid as well... because ultimately, for my salvation and the salvation of the rest of us, I need to see that we can ALL be well.